What Else Could Be True?

In a recent post, I shared a little about my midlife edit, that process of sorting through not just the stuff in my cupboards, but the beliefs, behaviours, and old stories I’ve been carrying around for years. And deciding, with intention, which ones still fit and which ones I’m ready to let go.

One of the tools that’s been surprisingly powerful in this process is something really simple (but not always easy): Separating fact from story.

Here’s what I mean. Fact is what the video camera would capture. Story is everything I tell myself about it.

And let’s be honest, the story is where things get sticky.

Our brains are master storytellers. They fill in the blanks. They make meaning. And while that’s part of being human, it also means we can end up reacting to our stories as if they are facts.

Take this example:

Fact: A delegate in my workshop is on their phone.

Version One – Self-Blame Stories: “I’m not interesting enough.” “I must be boring.” “I’m not good at this.”

Version Two – Judgement of Others: “How rude.” “They clearly don’t value this.” “They just don’t care.”

Neither version feels great, right?

Both of these versions are stories - interpretations and assumptions I’ve layered over a fact. Stories based on past experience or past stories.

The moment I notice that I’m in story mode, I have a choice. I can keep spiralling, or I can pause and get curious.

That’s where the next layer comes in, the question that’s helped me reframe so many moments: What else could be true?

Maybe they got an urgent message. Maybe they’re at capacity and can't take on anything more. Maybe they’re feeling overwhelmed. Maybe they’re right at the edge of their comfort zone and not sure how to engage.

That one question—what else could be true? opens up possibilities I hadn’t considered.

It moves me from reaction to response. From judgement to curiosity. From blame (of them or myself) to compassion.

This isn’t about making excuses. It’s about expanding my perspective. It's about seeing my stories for what they are, stories.

It’s about recognising how quickly our old patterns can leap in and try to take the wheel. Patterns rooted in beliefs like: “If I fail, I’m a failure.” “If I don’t please others, they won’t like me.” “If I’m not working all the time, I’m lazy.”

These stories were formed for a reason. They protected me, drove me, helped me achieve. But they were also quietly steering my life without me realising it.

Separating fact from story gave me awareness. Asking what else could be true? gave me freedom.

Again, it's no magic pill or silver bullet. It’s daily. It’s about gently noticing when the old narratives show up, and choosing not to blindly follow them. It’s giving myself the chance to respond instead of react.

So, if you find yourself stuck in a swirl of self-doubt or judgement, try this:

First, ask - what’s the fact here?

Then - what story am I telling myself about it?

And finally - what else could be true?

You might find, like I did, that this simple practice opens the door to more space, more choice, and a lot more self-compassion.

*Credit to The Conscious Leadership Group for first opening my eyes to this simple but brilliant tool!